Cancer
by Im.losing.hope
Summary: "Even though the world lost a brave little soul, heaven gained an angel." Alec has to see his son suffer through cancer. All human. One shot.


_A/n: Okay everyone.. be prepared for a sad-fic. So don't say I didn't give you a fair warning :) Anyway, I don't have very much to say here. This was inspired by the song Ronan by Taylor Swift. It made me cry.. like so much. Such a sad song. _

_Enjoy._

_Third Person POV:_

Alec lightwood felt so tired. He was sitting in one of those uncomfortable pastic hospital chairs that they usually kept next to a hospital bed. His hand was gently stroking the soft black hair that was starting to fall out on son's head. Eli was just a little boy. Only ten years old. He didn't deserve this. He was such a kind and loving little boy.

Alec felt like crying. But he felt too numb to let the tears fall. It came as a shock a few weeks ago when he got a call and was told that his son had a rapid form of cancer. After those words were uttered to him he felt like the entire world was crumbling down around him. His baby, dying because of a deadly disease. It wasn't fair. Why did it have to happen? So many questions ran through his mind, but all he could think about was how his son was going to cope through this.

He didn't want Eli to think he was going to die. Even though at this rate it was a very big possibility. The doctor's at the children's hospital that Eli currently resided in was very accommodating for him. And they always tried to give Alec good news. But that was a rarity in itself. Alec knew what was coming. Soon his little boy wouldn't be in his life anymore. And that thought tore through Alec like a tidal wave. His chest constricted painfully.

He wished there was a way to help him. But the best that could be done for him was putting him through chemo therapy. And that was making him sick as well. A lonely tear trailed down Alec's face. Then came more.

He stopped stroking Eli's hair and brought his hands up to his face, and he cried. He cried for his baby, who was a mere stranger to the world. He cried for all of the things that he won't do. All of the things he wouldn't accomplish. All of the things he wouldn't achieve.

Alec had finally gotten a stable job, and a loving boyfriend. He was going to create a better life for his son. But this got in the way. He wanted his baby to meet the _man_ who would become his other father. He was always asking where his mommy was or why she wasn't there. And on many occasions, he had to explain that his mommy wasn't coming home and that he didn't want her near him. And he didn't want anything to do with her because he wasn't interested in girls. It was quite a lot to tell a ten year old, but Eli took it all in stride.

He sniffled pathetically. He wanted Magnus to meet Eli. But he didn't imagine it would have to be like this. He thought about planning a nice little get together between the three of them. To see and feel like how it would be to have a full family.

He fumbled around in his pocket for his cellphone. His shaking fingers pressed 1. Magnus's speed dial.

_"Hello?"_

"M-Magnus? It's me, Alec."

_"You sound like you're crying.. what's wrong darling?"_

"It's probably best if you hear this in person. Would you be able to come down to the children's hospital?"

_"Why? What's going on, Alec?"_

"Please, Magnus? This is important."

_"Alright. I'll be there in a bit."_

Alec hung up the phone and stashed it away in his pocket. He got up from the uncomfortable plastic hospital chair and started to pace the floor. He was too anxious to sit in an uncomfortable chair right now. He ran his hands through his hair a couple of times and sighed. He stopped his pacing and went over to the small window that was on one of the walls and stared blankly out at the trees.

"Daddy?" He heard a small voice say.

He turned around and saw that Eli was awake from his nap. He went over to the small bed and pushed back the little bit of hair that was still on his sons head.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Tired. And weird," Eli replied.

The tears welled up in Alec's eyes again. He didn't know how to deal with this. He never thought that this would happen to his child. It wasn't like anything he ever experienced before. The pain that the thought of Eli dying brought him was unbearable.

"Daddy, why are you crying?" Eli asked him.

Alec wiped the tears from his face. "I'm just a little sad, that's all."

"Are you going to be okay?"

Alec wanted to laugh. Eli was the one who was dying from Cancer and he was asking his father if he was going to be okay. Eli was definitely Alec's son.

"I don't know. But I hope so," Just as Alec said this his phone started to ring.

"Hello?"

"_Hey babe, I'm down in the lobby. Wanna come down and get me?"_

"Yeah, I'll be there in a minute," Then Alec ended the call.

He turned to look at his baby, his dark blue eyes that were so much like his own, held curiosity. Alec gave Eli a small, sheepish, smile and slid the phone back in his pocket. He took his sons cold little hands in his own and looked him in the eyes.

"There's someone I would like you to meet. He's waiting downstairs so I have to go and get him. I hope you like him just as much as I do," Alec said with a little blush.

"Okay daddy," Eli replied with a childish smile.

Alec gave Eli a kiss on the forehead and left the room. He walked down the silent corridor, lost in thought. He was afraid Magnus wouldn't like Eli or Eli wouldn't like Magnus. He didn't really know what he would do if the two people he loved most didn't like each other. And then his mind trailed off onto other things. Like what if Magnus didn't like kids. Or dying kids. Alec was giving himself unnecessary anxiety about this.

When he reached the lobby he saw Magnus sitting in a cushiony chair, playing with his phone. He looked bored. Alec took a deep breath and walked over to his boyfriend. Magnus stood up when he saw Alec and rushed over to his side. He pulled him into a bone crushing hug.

"I don't know what's going on, but when you were on the phone it sounded like you needed a hug," Magnus whispered in his ear.

"I need more than hugs right now," Alec replied.

Magnus pulled away from his boyfriend and wiped the tears that were trailing down Alec's face. Magnus had a gentle expression on his face.

"What's going on Alec?" Magnus asked gently.

"I think it would be better if I showed you," Alec said.

Alec took Magnus' hand in his own and led him to the elevator. They got in the elevator and Alec pressed button five. They stood in silence for a minute and then they were on the floor where Eli was currently taking up residence.

"Alec, why are we in a children's cancer ward?" Magnus asked as he followed Alec down the hallway.

Alec didn't reply. He just kept walking with Magnus trailing behind him until he came to room 1013. The name marked on the little dry erase board on the door said Elijah Lightwood. Magnus quirked an eyebrow at the name but followed Alec into the room.

The room was stark white and smelled of cleaners. There were vases of flowers scattered throughout the room and little teddy bears on the window bench. And there, on the bed, wrapped up in pastel blue hospital blankets lay a little boy who looked a lot like Alec.

"Alec..?" Magnus trailed off.

"Magnus, this is Elijah Donovan Lightwood. My son," Alec said.

"Your son? I thought you were gay?" Magnus asked.

"I am. But I was at a party one time and sort of got drunk and passed out in a random room. When I woke up there was a girl on top of me. Needless to say, nine months later.. Eli showed up on my doorstep with a note from the girl saying that she didn't want him," Alec said.

"I'm sorry Alec," Magnus said sympathetically.

"It's not your fault," Alec replied.

Magnus cast a glance at Eli, he was a beautiful little boy. Even though he lost a lot of his hair and had various tubes and wires connected to his body. He walked toward the bed and placed a hand on the boys cold cheek. Eli opened his bright blue eyes and gave Magnus a confused stare.

"Eli, this is Magnus. My boyfriend," Alec said quietly.

"Okay," Eli said and went back to sleep.

Alec turned to Magnus and gave him an apologetic smile. "Don't take it personally. He's been sleeping a lot."

Magnus nodded. He felt his heart break for his boyfriend. He had no idea how Alec survived through this. And on his own up until now. Magnus wished Alec told him sooner, so he could help him through this. He didn't have any kids of his own but he could only imagine the pain that Alec felt every time he came in to see his son. People always did say the greatest pain one could ever feel is the pain of losing a child.

He took his hand away from Eli's face and wrapped his arms around Alec's thin hips. He gave him a bone crushing hug. He felt Alec wrap his arms around his neck and try to hold back the choked sobs. He whispered into Alec's ear that it was okay to cry. He then felt the grieving sobs against his neck. He felt a few tears of his own trickle down his face.

"Do you want to stay at my place tonight?" Magnus asked.

"O-okay."

* * *

That night, Alec and Magnus held each other through the entire night. Magnus knew his boyfriend was hurting and needed all the comfort he could get. Magnus stayed up half the night to make sure Alec would be okay. Throughout the night Magnus saw tears trailing down Alec's face and every time he kissed them away.

Just as he was about to drift into sleep, Alec's phone rung. He was still sleeping through the blaring sound so Magnus reached across to grab the phone. He answered the phone, his hands shaking badly.

"Hello?" Magnus said quietly.

"Is Alec Lightwood there? It's an emergency," A voice said on the other end.

"He's asleep right now. I'll wake him up," Magnus replied.

He gently shook Alec. Trying to wake him up without hurting him. Alec swatted at Magnus' hands like and angry kitten.

"What is it Magnus?" Alec said in a voice, heavy with sleep.

"Alec.. I think it's the hospital," Magnus told his boyfriend.

Alec's face drained of all color. He held his hand out for the phone. Magnus could tell that his hand was shaking, even in the dark. He gave Alec the phone and he brought it up to his ear.

"Yes, this is Alec," He said.

Magnus didn't take his eyes off Alec as he listened to the person on the other end talk. He saw Alec start trembling and wrapped him in a hug. Alec's breathing became heavier and Magnus felt tears drip down onto his shoulder.

"We'll be there soon," Alec said and hung up the phone.

He flicked the phone across the room and started to cry heavily. He laid his head on Magnus' shoulder and let all of his tears trickle down Magnus' shoulder and chest. Magnus rubbed Alec's back and didn't say anything. He just let his boyfriend cry.

"M-Magnus, that was Eli's doctor. He told me my son might not make it to tomorrow. We have to go down to the hospital," Alec said when he was able to calm himself down.

Magnus got up from their bed and started to get dressed. He put on a sweater and a pair of pajama pants. He got some clothes for Alec and helped him into them. He then took his hand and lead him out of their room. They put on slippers and then they were on their way to the hospital. Alec was thankful that there was taxi's out at this time.

* * *

That morning, Eli died.

Alec held him in his arms and cried. It was the most crying he ever done in his life. He started to cry even more when the doctors took his son's body away. Magnus was there through it all. Holding Alec while he cried and grieved for his son. His heart broke every time he heard an agonized sob come from Alec.

That day was hard for the both of them.

* * *

_Three Years Later._

It was Eli's birthday.

Magnus took his _husband_ to the graveyard to visit his son. Magnus remembered the little boy who looked so much like his father. The day he died, Alec couldn't stop crying. The following days, weeks, and months weren't any better. But soon, Alec was able to visit his son without crying hysterically. A year after Eli's death, Magnus proposed to Alec. In the graveyard. In front of Eli's grave. He knew it was kind of morbid, but when he asked Alec about it, he said it was perfect.

They came to Eli's grave. Alec placed a bouquet of flowers in front of the headstone. He touched the black polished stone tenderly.

"Happy thirteenth birthday, Eli. I hope you're doing okay. I miss you every single day. And I just wanted to tell you that I love you so much. And even though you're gone, I could never stop being proud to say that I was your father. You were such a joy to have and I loved being your father. Even though the world lost a brave little soul, heaven gained an angel. I love you."

_A/n: Well.. that was sad. _


End file.
